10 Habits That Can Soothe Your Soul After a Loss
Are you looking for a way to soothe your soul after a significant loss? It’s time to grieve to repair your heart. But it might not be just that easy.
Loss is a complicated and extensive category that embraces so many different facets of your life. Many folks automatically think of death when they hear the word loss, but here are the five most common types of loss that are all equally painful to manage:
- Functional – the loss of your ability to thrive due to an injury or illness
- Intrapsychic – the loss of your beliefs or your identity
- Material – the loss of a beloved possession, as a car, savings, or keepsake
- Relationship – breaking close personal ties with a friend or lover
- Death – the passing of someone you loved dearly
Whatever type of loss you face is a challenge, though some will be more grievous than others. It’s normal to feel a powerful sense of failure after you end a relationship, but it doesn’t compare to the psychological damage that occurs with death. The key is to soothe your soul and handle these major upheavals healthily and constructively.
Ten Helpful Ways To Soothe Your Soul After a Loss
Any loss in your life can throw you off balance and leave you in chaos. Have you ever ridden on a merry-go-round at the park? It’s fun while you’re on the wheel spinning around, but when you get off, you feel dizzy and disoriented.
The same feeling happens to you emotionally, physically, and spiritually when you experience any loss. Thankfully, you can be proactive and help to soothe your soul with some practical coping skills. Here are twelve ways to help you through the grieving process.
1. Focus on Others More Than Yourself to Soothe Your Soul
When you’re hurting, it’s only natural that you put the focus of your time on your misery. However, how would it change if you stopped focusing on your pain and started putting that energy towards something positive? If you want to soothe your soul, then why not find an organization that needs your help?
You could do a random act of kindness to someone in need, or you can get involved with a charity and help at a local soup kitchen. When you turn the attention away from your pain and suffering, you can fill it with the rich blessings of helping those who have it worse than you.
2. Start Expressing Gratitude
Expressing gratitude helps everyone to focus on the good things in life. When you’re consistently focusing on the negative things, it’s challenging to be positive. However, when you adopt an attitude of gratitude, you reset your mind and allow the positive energy to flow.
For starters, why not think about the fantastic people that you have in your life. Think of all the folks that cross your path from friends to loved ones and colleagues at work. While you might need to soothe your soul due to a recent loss, don’t let your mind focus on the issue.
When you start thinking about all the life experiences that have been amazing, the unforgettable moments, and the things you’ve been blessed with, it’s hard to stay down for too long.
3. Be Gentle and Patient to Soothe Your Soul
Don’t put unrealistic demands on yourself and become angry when you haven’t reached these goals. Be gentle and patient as you have been through a lot. When your hurts go deep down to the soul, it’s not going to go away overnight. Be easy on yourself and realize that while time can’t heal all wounds, it can make it better.
4. Use Positive Affirmations
If you’ve researched ways to soothe the soul, no doubt you’ve come across positive affirmations. These minor declarations can help you to get back on the right path through the power of positive thinking. Not to mention that they will also help to boost your spirits and energy levels.
Try saying statements like this every day:
- I am grounded
- I am calm
- I will get through this tough time
- I am enough
- I will be stronger than before
- I will not let this loss define me
5. Soothe Your Soul by Unplugging and Trying a Digital Detox
If you’re spending hours each day on your phone, computer, social media, and other timewasters, it’s a wise choice to unplug a bit. Digitally detoxing has become a necessary thing to a society that’s always plugged in. You will find that it can help your mental state as well as calm your soul a bit.
If you’re going through a bitter divorce, the last thing you want to see is tons of happy couples posting how much they love one another on social media. So, unplug for a couple of hours each day and see if it improves your outlook.
6. Give Yourself a Timeframe To Be Emotional
If you cry all day long, you’re not going to get anything done. However, if you learn to set a stopwatch on your grief, it can help. For instance, you can allow yourself one hour each day to cry, scream, be mad, and get it all out.
Once that hour is complete, you should dry your tears and move on. This timeout is an effective tool to help control grief. You’re not suppressing your emotions, but you’re not letting them overtake you either.
7. Understand the Fluidity of Grief
You’re no doubt well aware of the five stages of grief that were created by psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. While these stages are something that everyone suffering loss experiences, they don’t always go neatly. You may start out angry and then accept the loss to have denial come around and hit you again.
In fact, grief cannot be nice and neat and done in perfect order, as it’s like a zigzag line that no one knows where it will start or end. While everyone claims they need closure after suffering loss, Pauline Boss, Ph.D., from the University of Minnesota, states that there’s no such thing. She pioneered a site called Ambiguous Loss, where she uncovers her theories.
She states that people want to close the proverbial door when they lose someone, but it’s just not possible. Instead, she challenges folks to accept that they will have to learn to live with the pangs of grief the way you’ve learned to live with chronic headaches or backaches. It’s something that will just forever be a part of you.
8. Plan Ahead for Special Days
If you’ve recently suffered something like a miscarriage, you might need to prepare yourself for an upcoming baby shower for a friend. Whatever situations you face can be made worse when you’re not ready to come face-to-face with your grief all over again. Take time to make sure that you’re up for the challenge, and if you’re not, it’s okay to excuse yourself from the event.
9. Breathe Deeply to Soothe Your Soul
It’s the simplest of things to do on this list, yet it’s one of the most important. When you breathe, you let out all the anxiety and stress you harbor inside. Try not to inhale large breaths from your stomach, but rather allow your breaths to become shallow and come from your chest area.
Try something like this:
- Inhale to the count of six seconds.
- Hold your breath for the count of six seconds.
- Exhale for the count of six seconds.
When you try this exercise five to ten times each day, it will help to relax your entire body. It’s an excellent tool for those who suffer from anxiety, but it’s also beneficial to soothe the soul during grief.
10. Utilize Soul Retrieval
Shamanic beliefs are incorporated throughout society, though you may not understand them. Soul retrieval is a term that means you bring back the lost parts of yourself to create healing. It’s often assumed that when you lose someone you love, a piece of your soul dies with them.
So, this practice is about putting you back together again and making you a whole person. Think of it as a process of reconnecting the detached and suppressed parts of your soul and creating a sense of wholeness. It’s called ensoulment, and it’s something that will fix the innermost being.
Though some folks become numb or deny the soul’s existence, it’s essential to identify the significant loss and begin the healing journey within.
Final Thoughts on Ways To Soothe Your Soul After a Loss
Life is like a roller coaster with scary drops, hairpin turns, and upside-down flips that leave you nauseous. One minute you feel like you’ve got things under control, and the next minute you’re holding on for dear life. Have you ever heard someone tell you that their soul feels tired or in pain?
What they’re trying to tell you is that the pain they feel is out of the ordinary. The good news is that this is something that you can overcome and bounce back from, but it’s not going to happen overnight. Over time, you can soothe your soul and bring healing into the deepest parts of your being. It won’t happen all at once, but it will happen.