There’s nothing easy about relationships; however, certain things are deal-breakers when it comes to your emotional needs. Would you acknowledge red flags if they were waving right in front of your face?
You have two choices, you can either work on the issues in the relationship, or you can move on and find someone who isn’t so toxic.
22 Signs Your Partner Doesn’t Care About Your Emotional Needs
Do you know the signs of a toxic relationship? How would you gauge the health of you and your partner’s connection? Here are some signs that your emotional needs are in danger.
1. There’s an Overall Lack of Respect
You can tell a lack of respect when you speak, as they tend to roll their eyes, sigh heavily, or seem detached from the conversation. Your voice has no importance to them, and they make it known. They don’t care about your views, thoughts, or feelings.
Even if you get a new haircut and a makeover, they won’t throw a compliment your way. In fact, they may be down on you and often request changes, but when you put forth an effort, they won’t commend you on it.
3. They Encourage A Disconnect Between Family and Friends
Someone who is not caring for your emotional needs will encourage you to separate from family or friends. They don’t want anyone from the outside interfering with the toxic situation they have going on. They know they’re not doing you right, so they want to make sure that they separate you from those that might encourage you to leave.
4. They’re Demanding of Your Time
They’re very controlling of your time. The typical narcissist is very demanding and wants to know your schedule every minute of every day. Forget trying to have a social life as they want all your free time spent with them.
5. They Force Intimacy on You
The emotional abuser can be aggressive in the bedroom. They don’t consider your boundaries, and they will force themselves on you to meet their needs. They don’t care if you have a headache or are sick, as it’s all about them and what they desire.
6. They Monitor Your Spending
Emotional manipulation often comes with many other facets, like making you ask for money. Even if you earn a paycheck, you better not spend anything without their approval. One way of limiting you and your emotions is by controlling your finances.
7. They Call You Names When They’re Mad
Verbal abuse may not leave physical marks, but its damage is just as bad. Someone who calls you names and puts you down when you’re arguing is not the right person for you. Your partner should lift you and make you feel better about yourself.
8. They’re Very Secretive
While they want to know every little detail about your life, they are very secretive about theirs. Their control tactics are to put the focus on you and to take it from them. They can have a life you don’t know about, but you must be transparent.
9. They Push Moral Boundaries
If they know you have things you don’t like, such as smoking and drinking, they won’t respect you enough to keep it out of the home. Any boundaries you have, they will try to plow through to show who is in charge.
10. They’ve Cheated on You or Past Relationships
Part of your emotional needs requires someone to be faithful. If they’ve been unfaithful to you in the past and had issues in previous relationships, then it can cause some significant turmoil. Remember a tiger don’t change their stripes, and cheaters are usually repeat offenders.
11. They Refuse to Apologize
No matter how wrong they are, they will never apologize to you. They have a superior view of themselves, which means they won’t demean their authority by admitting they’re wrong. This person is impossible to deal with in an argument.
This person is not above using guilt to get their way. They will put you on a guilt trip and make you feel inadequate to do what they want. Their manipulation tactics can be subtle or blatant.
13. They Make You Feel Inadequate
In their eye, you can’t do anything right. Even cooking makes you walk on eggshells because it seems like you can’t do anything to please them.
14. They Won’t Make the Relationship Public
Another big issue that can play into your emotional need is the desire for validation. Someone who won’t commit to you can make you feel horrible. There’s nothing worse than being stuck in the “friend zone” when you want to take things to another level.
15. The Demand Passwords to Social Media and Email Accounts
It’s not that they don’t trust you, but they know that they’re less than honorable with their accounts. They want you to tell them all your passwords so that they can monitor your every move. The Pew Research Center did a study in 2014 on sharing passwords.
They found that 67 percent of married couples choose to share passwords for transparency. However, it can be an infringement of your boundaries if you don’t wish to share this information.
16. Their Insecurities Dictate Your Life
They make their insecurities part of your life. For instance, they may constantly accuse you of cheating on them, or they may be very suspicious of your every move. Usually, when someone is crazy jealous, it’s because they have something to hide.
17. They Hold a Double Standard
While they expect you to live by one set of rules, they live by another. There is no consistency in the relationship, as they expect far more out of you than they’re willing to give. This is nothing but an emotional roller coaster ride.
18. They’re Mean to Family or Friends
You can always tell a lot about a person by the way they treat their parents. How do they speak to their mom and dad, and if they’re rude to them, you can’t expect them to be nice to yours? Additionally, it may not be that they don’t like your friends and family, but it has more to do with wanting to control who you’re around.
19. The Communication is Terrible
Communication is one of the foundational building blocks that people use to strengthen their union. You must communicate to ensure you’re on the same page. However, your communication with each other is lackluster, and it’s hard to know where you stand with them at times.
20. You Can’t Trust Them
It’s a big issue if there is no trust in your relationship. As much as you want to trust them, there’s just something in the pit of your stomach that feels off. A study was conducted and posted on the Journal of Neuroscience.
The vagus nerve runs from the stomach to the brain, and much research is going into the gut-brain connection. However, could these gut instincts be triggers of anxiety that your body knows something isn’t right. According to this study, it’s entirely possible that the feeling in your gut might be a response to your intuitive side, which is located in the right hemisphere of the brain.
21. They Lie
You can’t trust a liar. If they lie to you once, there are probably 100 other lies that you don’t know about. They can keep you in an emotional upheaval with their inability, to be honest.
22. They’ve Physically Hurt You
There is never, ever a reason for anyone to put their hands on you. If they do it one time, they will do it again. The classic abuser hits and then feels sorry and promises the moon or buys an expensive gift. Don’t fall for this type of abuse.
If you let them get by with hitting you or any other kind of abuse, then you’re going to be in an emotional and physical upheaval as long as this relationship persists.
Your emotional needs are just as important as your physical ones. A partner doesn’t have to be toxic or abusive not to meet these needs either. You can have 101 things going right in your relationship, but it can be miserable if you lack a few areas.
Perhaps you have a great relationship where you respect one another, and there is true love, but you feel emotionally bankrupt. It doesn’t always mean that the person you’re with is terrible; it just means that they’re not suitable for you. You need someone who completes you and makes you feel loved and respected in all manners within the relationship.
You don’t have to settle for someone less than perfect for you just because they look good on your arm. Find someone that treats you like the king or queen you are, and you will find someone that makes your life and your emotions easier to handle.